13 Infertility Jokes to Make You Not Want to Punch Someone in the Face



Infertility humor is a funny thing…the urge to laugh about our experiences comes from our emotional pain.

As Erma Bombeck once said, “There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.”

But personally, I think Carol Burnett said it best: “Comedy is tragedy plus time.” Ain’t that the truth!

So when infertility starts to get you down, remember these infertility jokes and punch someone in the face.

1. Thanks for the infertility advice! I feel much better now that I know God’s will for me to be depressed, broke, and physically screwed up. I think I’ll “just adopt!”Thanks for the infertility advice! I feel much better now that I know God's will for me to be depressed, broke, and physically screwed up. I think I'll 'just adopt!'

2. When you say everything happens for a reason, don’t be surprised when I slap you in the face. It happened for a reason.When you say everything happens for a reason, don't be surprised when I slap you in the face. It happened for a reason.

3. Oh, it took you two whole months to get pregnant? Boo frickity hoo.Oh, it took you two whole months to get pregnant? Boo frickity hoo.

4. I apologize for the shit I said to you while I was on clomid.I apologize for the shit I said to you while I was on clomid.

5. IVF: Taking the fun out of procreation since 1978.IVF: Taking the fun out of procreation since 1978.

6. Is it a full moon? No, she’s on fertility drugs.Is it a full moon? No, she's on fertility drugs.

7. On my honor I will try to not slap the next pregnant woman I see complaining about how much it sucks to be pregnant.On my honor I will try to not slap the next pregnant woman I see complaining about how much it sucks to be pregnant.

8. Thanks for telling me to just have sex if I want to get pregnant. I’ve spent thousands on fertility treatments and never thought of that.Thanks for telling me to just have sex if I want to get pregnant. I've spent thousands on fertility treatments and never thought of that.

9. I’m on clomid. What’s your bullshit excuse?I'm on clomid. What's your bullshit excuse?

10. Yes, honey. Of course I think giving you two-inch needle injections into your butt muscle every night is sexy.Yes, honey. Of course I think giving you two-inch needle injections into your butt muscle every night is sexy.

11. Nope. Still not pregnant but thanks for pointing out how fat I’ve gotten.Nope. Still not pregnant but thanks for pointing out how fat I've gotten.

12. I hear he’s IVF. Like way wanted.I hear he's IVF. Like way wanted.

13. Hey girl, let’s increase the fertility rate.Ryan Gosling: Hey girl, let's increase the fertility rate.


One Response to 13 Infertility Jokes to Make You Not Want to Punch Someone in the Face

  1. Aaron April 11, 2013 at 6:31 pm #

    Thanks for these! You picked out some good ones. Humor is important in any situation, especially the more difficult ones 🙂

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