CNN’s ‘Gary and Tony Have a Baby’ Explores Egg Donation, Gay Parenting

CNN’s new gay parenting documentary “Gary and Tony Have a Baby” debuted on June 24 to positive reviews. The documentary follows married couple Gary Spino and Tony Brown as they plan the birth of their child and work with an egg donor and gestational surrogate to make their baby.

So far the entire video is not online, but CNN has published a few clips–the one at the top introduces the couple and their desire for children.

Here is a short clip of Gary and Tony’s egg donor discussing her decision to donate to a gay couple.

O’Brien asks the donor if it gave her pause to donate to a gay male couple and the donor responds, “It never even crossed my mind. The first time I had to think about it was when my case worker actually called me up and asked me two or three times in the same conversation, ‘Are you sure you don’t mind working with a homosexual couple?’ And I was confused by the question…Like, why would that bother me? They need eggs, I’ve got eggs. They deserve to have a family like anybody else.”

In O’Brien’s brief article describing the program she notes that the biggest question the couple faces is why they didn’t adopt.

“So far the only challenges they’ve faced come from the gay community. People keep asking why they didn’t adopt. They both say they wanted their own biological child and hasten to add that makes them just like any other couple. That answer doesn’t seem to be enough. They get asked the question again at a New York screening and twice more in Atlanta. The Atlanta questioner accuses them of looking selfish. Tony asks him why gay people shouldn’t want what heterosexual parents have, why they have a bigger obligation to take adoptive children even if they don’t feel up for it.”

Sounds like every other couple using fertility treatments to me.

What’s your take on gays using fertility treatments to become parents? Let us know in the comments below.

One Response to CNN’s ‘Gary and Tony Have a Baby’ Explores Egg Donation, Gay Parenting

  1. Sue T June 25, 2010 at 9:26 pm #

    Gary and Tony are not alone. Many straight and gay couples or singles who pursue egg donation or other assisted reproduction are questioned about why they did not adopt.

    Adoption is just one way to have a family – and adopting an infant is often incredibly expensive with parental age restrictions and waiting lists that are years long. Bringing home an infant from a foreign country is nearly impossible due to the length of time for adoption processing in other countries and again the wait lists can be years long with no guarantees that the programs won't change or close down while you are waiting.

    No one thinks to ask a couple without fertility problems why they chose to conceive rather than adopting. Yet it is often the first thing asked of anyone pursuing fertility treatments. It simply is not fair – everyone should be able to choose the path that is best for them.

    There are many reasons that parents may wish to pursue assisted reproduction – and there are as many reasons why someone may choose to pursue adoption. Each family must explore their own desires and limitations to decide what is right for them. There is no shame in pursuing assisted reproductive technologies to start a family!

    Congrats to Gary and Tony on their journey to bring home the child that is meant to be theirs.